Until Hayun is in a place where he's able to process anything other than the reassurance that he isn't alone, he just has to trust that Yohan is the good person he thinks he is and will keep his secrets for him. They're out there now, after all. He can't take them back. He can't just say that he didn't mean it and take it all back. He can't produce grandparents or his fake aunt and say that he really had them all along. It's out there now and there's nothing he can do about it except for hope Yohan understands how important this secret is to him.

"I'm the only person who really remembers them. Dying and taking their memories with me isn't fair to them. They deserve better." Truthfully, he was simply too scared to act on any of his darker thoughts. He was afraid of what it would feel like before he didn't feel anything anymore. He was afraid of it not working and then laying there in pain with no one to help him. His cowardice in that situation is by no means a bad thing, but it definitely doesn't make him feel strong for not doing it.

For a moment, there's silence. Even the soft sounds of Hayun's sniffling have quieted. That short silence is broken, however, by the quiet sound of Hayun's cheek and hair rubbing against fabric as he nods his head against the comforter. "You'll be here whenever I need someone. I understand."